Posts Tagged Education

Straight through the Core!

Posted by Wilson in Education, funny on June 4, 2009

If you’ve ever plotted as a kid to dig right through the earth to end up on the other side of the earth, then you arn’t alone. Personally, I blame that movie I saw as a kid, where the main character gets shot through the earth and ends up in china. According to the National Geographic though, not everyone in the world who fantasises about doing the whole “The Core” thing isn’t going to end up in China.
The diagram above illustrates just where you’ll end up if you were able to enact your digging fantasies (since, you know, it’s really hot down there), or in science gibberish, your antipode. Most people in America would be disappointed to find out that they’d come out on the wet side of the Indian Ocean, with the exception of Colorado, who’d find themselves sitting pretty on Amsterdam Island.
Fascinating stuff, as you can pretty much imagine. Of course, as a fijian, your immediate thought would be, on which side of this beautiful earth where would we end up? For some strange reason known only to the producers of the article, out of all the pacific islands out there, the nice people at National Geo decided to highlight where Fiji would end up. Right smack bang in the middle of Timbuktu, Africa.
I’ve always suspected we had something in common with the people from Africa, aside from our genetic love of curly hair and winning IRB matches. Now, when someone says “From here to Timbuktu”, you can claim with a slight tilt of your nose that Timbuktu is actually our antipode, so it isn’t as bad as was mentioned.
Then you can smile with content while you get your head smacked for being a smart ass. 

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Dealing with Countries 1st Line of Defense a.k.a. Embassies

Posted by Wilson in Education, Tourists, annoying, tipsntricks, travel on July 8, 2008

Who wants to go overseas when you have everything you could ever need right here? Who needs fine wine when we can make the most serious head tripping home brew that’ll guarantee your not safety? Who wants to travel in limousine style when we’ve got private cars that’ll spring up to serve your every need whenever a bus strike happens?

However, in the far-fetched scenario that you do indeed need to leave said paradise shores, then getting your passport and countless papers are in order. And the place to go should you want access to your destination country are the Embassies.

Long heralded by 1st world countries as the best deterrent to mass migration, embassies are, as the title says, the first line of defense against anyone and everyone interested in crossing their hallowed entry points. Government bureaucracy, inept staffing, long queues and snobby nosed secretaries all conspired to make the stamp on your passport worth its weight in blood. Now, thanks in part to 9/11, border control has taken on a whole new meaning.

Of course, when all else fails, there’s always the internet yes?

Mayvelous May has taken the arduous, near herculean task of reviewing a few of the major embassies here in Suva, including the British, American, Australian and even French embassies.

At the beginning of each embassy review she gives the name of the embassy, as well as a summary of what to expect once you step in through the doors (French Embassy – Very quiet). A few paragraphs of policies, procedures and at times, frustration should give you a fair idea of how everything goes down in said embassy.

At the end of the embassy review, she’s placed the contact details, as well as how easy it is to get in contact with them, a very handy feature indeed (Phone Support: The number mentioned on the website is useless, once called, tells you to call another number. Extremely RUDE and snappy response).

After reading the whole article, the first prize to the most difficult, hard to get to, hard to go through embassy comes as no surprise whatsoever. Of course, you may have had a different experience with said reviewed embassies. Who knows. So, if you’d like a head start through enemy terrain, then look no further then May’s “Embassies: Knowing how anal your local one is”.

Ok. That was a bad title. So sue me.

PS: May, use review stars! Everyone loves review stars :D

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TPAF’s Demon Slave Driver a.k.a. Timi the Worker

Posted by Wilson in Education, advertising on July 5, 2008

“You’d better update your page boy,” Awesome Cake said, using his disapproving radio voice while tapping the screen. My blog sat on the display, mocking me for my inability to get on top of things, let alone update the damn blog.

Of course I had to update my blog. How else could I survive the long waits inbetween posts, where there isn’t a comment that hits my mailbox, with a big “SOMEONE HAS LEFT A COMMENT! OH! MY! GOSH! PEOPLE ACTUALLY READ THIS CRAP!” heading. I have to admit it, I’m addicted to reading people’s comments on the blog. Its the only feedback I get from the readers, and it provides a colourful window into some of their thoughts and positions on said post, such as “Your blog sucks” or “who the shit are you guys,. Fiji is Fiji. Go to PNG or Solomon and get your butt kicked around…stop criticizing Fiji.” Free and fair speech I always say makes the world go round and blogs become crap.

In more interesting news, a few of the Saturday papers have this interesting competition going on, courtesy of the hard working folks at Training Productivity Authority of Fiji. Because TPAF is concerned with our nations productivity, they’ve stepped up and produced an icon/ambassador for productivity that’ll get kids all hyped up about slave labour camps and such.

Behold, Timi the Worker.


When it comes to educating kids about certain grown up and at times difficult to understand adult themes, nothing beats cute, fluffy, near huggable mascots and their giggly, stiff arm waving tactics. The more cute the avatar, the less aware children are to the fact that they’re been slowly imbued with whatever message is needed to be taught.

Timi however, is the exact polar opposite of all that is cute and fluffy. Aside from choosing a creature that most kids interact with on a daily basis with either a lens to burn them, mortein to kill them, or a swift palm to squash them, ants aren’t exactly what you may describe as ‘lovable’.

Nevertheless, Timi is a hard worker, and he doesn’t give a rat’s behind as to what kids think. And as with all hardworkers, he goes to work with his set of tools that include a garden fork which looks more like a vampire hunting multi-stake shotgun then anything to do with peaceful gardens and flowers. Beside his trusty hammer of justice and tied to his waist is a bag full of nails that double as ammo for said vampire hunting multi-stake shotgun. He also sports a nice hard hat.

But it was those eyes that got me. Those freaky, bulgy, win every stare contest eyes that drew my attention.


I don’t know about you, but those eyes are the stuff nightmares are made of. Long after the educated children will have grown up, those eyes will still haunt their dreams, with visions of piles and piles of documents yet to process, and deadlines of yesterdays fluttering around their head, while computers that sit on the desk sprout spam mail and deny access to microsoft word.

And all the while, those eyes watch the people struggle.

I wonder exactly how successful the education campaign went for TPAF.

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