There are wingers in a rugby team, and there are wingers. Rupeni Caucau used to be a wing. And when he was the wing for the Fiji Team, everybody said this fucker could run.

Regarded by many as the greatest attacking player in world rugby, he has as many tries to his name as his no-shows, marijuana bans and failed passports. No other fiji player has garnered so much love and hate at the same time as Rupeni. Well. Maybe Serevi. But that’s sevens. We’re talking about the big boys here.

Speaking of big, Rupeni has recently gone the way of the whale, putting on pounds to place him in the running for both wing and prop. Personally I blame the french and their apple tarts. Seriously. As he is now, he surprised even me, and trust me, I’ve seen some pretty chubby rugby players in my time, but none as hefty as him.

However, while they may share the tipping scales element, there’s something they all lack compared to him, a vital point that separates the fat rugby players, from the others. They’re not Caucau. French apple tarts be damned, overweight or underweight, Caucau still possess the speed, agility and allround what-the-fuckery he had back when he was in his prime. He’s packing on the pounds, but he’s still running in the tries.

Watching the above video is an exercise in amazement as you see Caucau receive the ball, and like an eel, slips through the defense like a hot knife through butter. Oh the defense tries to stop him. I can see why they have hope. It’s just one fat dude right? WRONG. Fat dude is magically drenched in oil, you-no-tackle-me-voodoo and so much good luck he’ll make any Irish green with envy. And speed? As the second score demonstrates, fat don’t matter if you can still outrun FOUR rugby players. (Although it does result in a funny cartwheel at the end )

This man better be allowed to play for Fiji come the 2011 Rugby World Cup. Or no amount of french pastry is going to save the Fiji Rugby Board from the ensuing wrath of the fans.

Courtesy of Rugbydump.com

Alternate universes exist. These universes exist independent of each other, the people in them merrily carrying on with their own little lives, unbeknown to them the reality of another version of themselves is alive, just outside their realm of reality. Science has always scoffed at the idea that there is more then one version of Mr Jone and his reality, but at last, we have real irrevocable proof that out there, hidden from all our senses and technology, is another universe, very similar to ours, in close sync with us, mirroring our lives with intimate accuracy, save for a few scant details that differ on a minute basis. This ticket…is from the other side. In the alternate universe, they are having the very same event, the Coca-cola Games. Their ticket is the exact same copy as ours, right down to the venue. However, the only (major) difference between their ticket and ours is this; their month of April has 31 days in it. That’s right folks, an extra day for the alternates. Isn’t it just amazing.

That…or it could be a simple typo. A rather expensively simple typo.

I think I’ll lay off the Fringe episodes for abit.

Thanks Gurumi!

Art, as they say, imitates life.

And when it comes to movies, no stone has been left unturned. You name it, they’ve got a movie for it. True stories, action flicks, girly movies, horror movies, documentaries, and the staple of all feel good stories – sports movies. Sports movies are a dime in a dozen, with almost every popular sport covered. From the rough-it-out boxing slugfest that is Raging Bull, to the hoop sailing documentary, Hoop Dreams, most sports fans have a movie that is both loved by critics and fans alike, with sports lovers identifying with said movie as well as adding it to their much hallowed dvd rack.

Except for rugby.

Rugby is a sport that, while being able to lay claim to being a world-wide sport, isn’t quite the eye catcher for movie makers in general. Most popular big budget movies that contain rugby are just that, rugby in the background. In The Four Feathers, rugby was just another tool used by the government to groom the men for war and violence and is shown briefly at the beginning. Quite appropriate if I might say so myself. The Departed has a scene at the beginning where Matt Damon plays 10 seconds of rugby before his team is shown on the losing end. Proper mainstream rugby movies are quite rare, and unfortunately, the one movie that most people will remember rugby for isn’t about rugby but rather rugby players who err eat each other.

Of course, you’ve got Forever Strong, the most recent rugby movie to grace the dvd rental stores that is, if anything, a play by the numbers clique ridden flick that adopts every staple notion of every great sports movie made and flaunts it like no tomorrow. Sorry. But its no fair when boxers have their “Rocky” and american footballers have their “Remember the Titans”, and all we’ve got are some non-new zealanders butchering the haka both on the field and in prison >.>

All however, is not lost. Hope is just around the corner. From the stable that’s brought you Mystic River, Million dollar baby and Grand Torino comes our (hopefully) saviour of a proper rugby movie, Invictus.

This is a dream come true for the oval ball fans like me who despair for a proper treatment of our beloved sport on the big screen. This movie has a lot going for it that, at least I hope, seems destined for greatness and perhaps even a few oscar awards along the way. Let’s do a checklist shall we?

1) Awesome director? Clint “Make my day punk!” Oscar chewing, .44 magnum wielding, anti-hero, manly man Eastwood? Check. Punk.

2) Awesome leading character? Morgan ‘batman’s Q” Freeman playing Mandela? Come on – he was batman’s gadget go-to guy! Who can compete with that? Batman says “check”.

3) Awesome leading character 2? Matt “My name is Jason Bourne and my head hurts” Damon playing Francois Pienaar? A karate chop to the head check.

4) Awesome story? It’s based on a true story! How more awesome can that be?! IMDB says:

“The film tells the inspiring true story of how Nelson Mandela joined forces with the captain of South Africa’s rugby team to help unite their country. Newly elected President Mandela knows his nation remains racially and economically divided in the wake of apartheid. Believing he can bring his people together through the universal language of sport, Mandela rallies South Africa’s rugby team as they make their historic run to the 1995 Rugby World Cup Championship match.”

Here’s the trailer to dispel any lingering doubts:

Or for you youtubers (Vinaka Kania Tiko!):

December 11, 2009 folks. As village 6 always say, “Mark the date.”

I am so proud to be a Fijian. So proud.

We lost the quarter finals of the world cup 2007 to South Africa.

But despite the loss, besides the fact that we’re not in the running anymore, despite all the talk about the predictions of us getting trounced by South Africa, we proved to the world something.

We showed the Tier 1 countries that when push comes to shove, we can take anyone to the wire. When it comes to just the two teams on the field, the only thing that matters is how much heart you have.

No sponsorship dollars. No fancy tight grab-hardy shirts, no 1st tier technical bullshit.

Just the game, the ball, and you.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. This is by far one of the best games Fiji has ever played.

We had nothing to lose, but South Africa had the most pressure on them. They had the hard job of keeping up their image as one of one of the top rugby teams in the world. Fiji? Why we were nothing but a bunch of lucky bastards who by some weird twist of fate, found themselves in a quarter final that by facts alone, shouldn’t even have beaten Wales.

But beat Wales we did. And we sure gave South Africa a run for their money.

In the end, Fiji did their best. And for that I salute them.

PS: Happy Fiji Day people

Of course, my grog buddy was quick to point out that the margin difference between Fiji and Wales each time we played was lessening over the years as we seem to have improved, with the last encounter a painful 11-10. However, the fact remained. We’ve never won against them.

So you can understand my hesitance at the thought of staying up until 3am on a sunday morning just to watch Fiji lose. Or so I thought.

It was around 2am that I finally mosied down to my neighbour’s house, ready to drown my sorrows in the murky waters that is kava, my mind already made up about the outcome of the game. The usual grog doppers were all gathered around the plastic bowl, misery seemingly settled in before I arrived.

“Look on the bright side,” they said, raising their hands in a vague gesture that was either defeat or grog dopiness, “at least when it happens, we can take out our frustration on the tv.”

“Sounds good to me,” I winked mischeviously.

When the tv sparked to life, the National Side was standing on the field, arms crossed on their chest, eyes all teary, belting out the Fiji National Anthem. I stood up of course. No matter how bad Fiji plays I have to salute my country Though I was slightly annoyed at the sight of grown men shedding a tear or two on International television. Nothing irks me more then a big muscular fijian dude crying during the anthem. Man up mate! We all know Fijians are proud of their country. Let the gameplay do the talking.

To make the long story short, we won.

And what a game that was. For the last few minutes, I didn’t sit down. Heck, we all didn’t sit down, grog dopiness be damned. For what seemed like an eternity, we were leading by a measley 4 points. Four points! And boy did we hold onto that ball like there was no tomorrow.

And that surprised me. I’ve seen Fiji play in all sorts of matches over the years, but with this game, the level of professionalism was such that at times I had to pinch myself to make sure I was still watching the same team that had struggled against the likes of Japan, let alone Canada.

Granted, there were times where indiscipline crept in, and there were still elements of ‘va na koro’ rugby here and there, but for the most part, the control of the ball, the fact that we won all of our line outs, the strength of the defense, the unnerving accuracy of nicky’s kicking, it was…heart warming to say the least.

I know I’ve always been a negative bastard, but damnit, there’s always a first time.

That was by far one of the best games I’ve seen Fiji play in awhile.

And I take off my provobial hat to them.

PS: I’m not the only one who was impressed by Fiji’s game.

Babasiga had a link to a sports writer’s blog post in the Guardian Unlimited. Basically he was blown away by the brilliance of the match, and apparently was live blogging right up until the last minute, right there at the game.

Best comment on the post?

image source: www.bbc.co.uk

“i’m pretty sure that seru rabeni isn’t human though…”

Agreed. With a hair style like that, he’s more Predator then Rugby Player.

The thing is, this is a common fact across the board when it comes to the locals understanding the importance of having a website. Most major companies have websites, but most people are oblivious to its advantages. It would be nice to see websites on things such as local events eg. a Hibiscus festival website etc.

Local blogs are another story. Due to the relative ease of starting a blog, we are in no short supply for local blogging content. Heck this blog you’re reading is proof! Although lately, with all the fuss about political blogs getting the spotlight, non-controversy bloggists like us seem to be getting a slightly bad name.

Here’s hoping that common sense, a healthy dose of kava, and links to the Fiji Meats Man video will prevail.

Fiji only has themselves to blame after the dust has settled at the IRB sevens. I could go on and string trees with a list of their short comings but in the end it would serve no purpose.

They messed up. We lose the cup.

No more victory soap adverts after the loss…and definitely not after seeing this video of Ryder’s interviewee skills off the field It certainly doesn’t help when you’re being interviewed on camera by a chick in a bar(nightclub?) with a ready supply of beer and girls are nearby.

“The quicker”?? Classic
“Lets Play Downtown…attitude”?? He should be fired -_-