Seen in the Fiji Times Village 6 movie times section is this classic slogan re-worded to suit the reading and comprehension level of the locals.

To reiterate; The slogan for the movie in the above badly pixelated photo reads:

They are the most dangerous killers on the planet but this not our planet.

Boy I sa scared saraga, but the ad heavy I sa want to go watch this movie boy.

We go?

Alternate universes exist. These universes exist independent of each other, the people in them merrily carrying on with their own little lives, unbeknown to them the reality of another version of themselves is alive, just outside their realm of reality. Science has always scoffed at the idea that there is more then one version of Mr Jone and his reality, but at last, we have real irrevocable proof that out there, hidden from all our senses and technology, is another universe, very similar to ours, in close sync with us, mirroring our lives with intimate accuracy, save for a few scant details that differ on a minute basis. This ticket…is from the other side. In the alternate universe, they are having the very same event, the Coca-cola Games. Their ticket is the exact same copy as ours, right down to the venue. However, the only (major) difference between their ticket and ours is this; their month of April has 31 days in it. That’s right folks, an extra day for the alternates. Isn’t it just amazing.

That…or it could be a simple typo. A rather expensively simple typo.

I think I’ll lay off the Fringe episodes for abit.

Thanks Gurumi!

Because we all know how uncivilised chickens can be sometimes…

For those of us not in the know, uncivilised chicken is the literal translation of ’Jungli Murgi’, which is more of a slang description of how the chicken you’re about to eat was raised i.e. not cooped up in some unnatural metal meshed, artificial light, automatically feeding machines environment, fed weight lifting buff up vitamins along the way sorta up bringing.

No. This chicken was raised old school. Like, a simple fence, a tray with water, a little house on the prairie in the corner complete with adoring farm kids to chase them around, squeals of laughter abound, precious exercise for the coming night where the chickens have to play hide & seek with hungry mongoose. These chicken are Darwin darlings, bush bunnies, uncivilised. Ca.

Is there any taste difference between ‘uncivilised chicken’ and the run-of-the-mill manufactured versions? Of course. When you eat ‘jungli murgi’, know that you are consuming the bloodline of a thousand brave and defying chickens who laugh in the face of ‘progress’ and have struck a path on their own, forging through the tall grasses of the dangerous highlands of Naitasiri, pecking away at conventionalism, eating the very hearts of their enemies with cold precise eyes, crowing to the full moon on top of tallest mango trees, their very essence containing the spirit of the land upon which they live on.

Or something along those lines >.>

The Fiji Times salute alludes to a more sinister figure then intended when they begun celebrations to honour our country’s World War 2 heroes.

Vinaka @Strangepants!

This license plate is full of win.

The Fuck up Slip-up

What is wonderful about great literature is that it transforms the man who reads it towards the condition of the man who wrote. ~E. M. Forster

Although the above notice is not great literature, I would not want to be transformed towards the condition of the man who wrote it.

Aside from the potential confusion arising from the constant name change every year of the spot (“We go to the arena?” “No! We go to the dome!” “Duh – same thing!” “No it isn’t!”), the venue has the capability to generate a huge amount of advertising for 12 months by way of product placement in the biggest way. Imagine that. Pure, undulated brain-washing genius.

When it first opened, it was known as the Post Fiji National Stadium, Last year the place was known as the FMF Dome. This year, “Make the Most of Now” Vodafone has taken over the building, opting to name it an ‘arena’ so that people are fooled into thinking that Extreme Fights are hosted here.

At the moment this is what the arena looks like.

Meh.

After awhile, I thought, hey, I wonder what the place would look like, if, given the chance (and the deep pockets as well as kind heart of Babu Khan), this blog were to have its name plastered all across the front.

Now we’re talking…

Because this blog has covered a wide variety of stories depicting the never-boring life in Fiji, it only made sense to draw inspiration from some of its more stellar articles. The two stripdance-for-free girls were of course courtesy of Ed’s Bar post, and the grog invader Fred/Ken drawn from the Grog Invasion post.

What can I say? Sex, drugs and advertising go hand in hand

Any ideas for a Paradise Not Found Signage?