Graphic Designer: Boss, here’s the poster for the new Super 8 movie.

Boss: What? Where? This? What’s this?

Graphic Designer: It’s…the poster. For the movie.

Boss: Poster?! We can’t use this for our newspaper times ad! Looks like someone forgot to turn the camera the right way up! Why are there silhouettes? Where’s the main star power?

Graphic Designer: Well it’s about a bunch of kids tha -

Boss: KIDS?! This poster ain’t no Harry Potter! Get me another poster for the movie!

Graphic Designer: Well we have the teaser poster…

Boss: Sweet Mary – did I just walk into a fucking Art Gallery? Where are the people? Last time I checked, movies were about people! People!

Graphic Designer: Well it’s going for more of a minimalistic -

Boss: Minimalistic your pay grade! I want a person in place of this damn artsy fartsy camera glorification photo of a damn poster!

Hmmm….say….remember that movie with that blue glowy guy whose dong was all you could look at -

Graphic Designer: Watchmen.

Boss: Yeeahh. That one. Grab a picture from that movie and put it in. People here like superheroes. Besides, there’s a damn ‘super’ in the title of this one, we might as well give them something to get excited over.

(Later)

A sight often seen on public service vehicles (but not buses…bus companies tend to frown upon employee’s creative decorations), these vehicle stickers adorn the back of the taxi or minibus, usually accompanied by a barrage of other stickers that fight for your attention (or conspire to cause a rear ender). What’s unique about this particular sticker and the reason why it is this week’s ‘Photo of the Week’  is the fact that the text that accompanies the sticker isn’t meant to be as is.

“Your Text” is a place holder, with the actual intended end tagline to be of the owner’s doing, by choosing from a selection of letters that come with the sticker.

Here’s the kicker: I have not seen 1 sticker with a customized title. Not one. Literally all of the stickers I’ve, with many picture variations (the more popular version being Hobbes taking a piss) all have the same placeholder ‘Your Text’ and left as is. It’s almost as if everyone thinks ‘Your Text’ is as cool as the cartoon image above it, with a meta hidden meaning behind it that can only be understood if you leave the placeholder tagline and act like you meant to to spell it out that way. Or that you actually know what it means, but won’t tell anyone for fear of losing the air of mysteriousness about you.

The education begins now.

Seen in the Fiji Times Village 6 movie times section is this classic slogan re-worded to suit the reading and comprehension level of the locals.

To reiterate; The slogan for the movie in the above badly pixelated photo reads:

They are the most dangerous killers on the planet but this not our planet.

Boy I sa scared saraga, but the ad heavy I sa want to go watch this movie boy.

We go?

Alternate universes exist. These universes exist independent of each other, the people in them merrily carrying on with their own little lives, unbeknown to them the reality of another version of themselves is alive, just outside their realm of reality. Science has always scoffed at the idea that there is more then one version of Mr Jone and his reality, but at last, we have real irrevocable proof that out there, hidden from all our senses and technology, is another universe, very similar to ours, in close sync with us, mirroring our lives with intimate accuracy, save for a few scant details that differ on a minute basis. This ticket…is from the other side. In the alternate universe, they are having the very same event, the Coca-cola Games. Their ticket is the exact same copy as ours, right down to the venue. However, the only (major) difference between their ticket and ours is this; their month of April has 31 days in it. That’s right folks, an extra day for the alternates. Isn’t it just amazing.

That…or it could be a simple typo. A rather expensively simple typo.

I think I’ll lay off the Fringe episodes for abit.

Thanks Gurumi!

Because we all know how uncivilised chickens can be sometimes…

For those of us not in the know, uncivilised chicken is the literal translation of ’Jungli Murgi’, which is more of a slang description of how the chicken you’re about to eat was raised i.e. not cooped up in some unnatural metal meshed, artificial light, automatically feeding machines environment, fed weight lifting buff up vitamins along the way sorta up bringing.

No. This chicken was raised old school. Like, a simple fence, a tray with water, a little house on the prairie in the corner complete with adoring farm kids to chase them around, squeals of laughter abound, precious exercise for the coming night where the chickens have to play hide & seek with hungry mongoose. These chicken are Darwin darlings, bush bunnies, uncivilised. Ca.

Is there any taste difference between ‘uncivilised chicken’ and the run-of-the-mill manufactured versions? Of course. When you eat ‘jungli murgi’, know that you are consuming the bloodline of a thousand brave and defying chickens who laugh in the face of ‘progress’ and have struck a path on their own, forging through the tall grasses of the dangerous highlands of Naitasiri, pecking away at conventionalism, eating the very hearts of their enemies with cold precise eyes, crowing to the full moon on top of tallest mango trees, their very essence containing the spirit of the land upon which they live on.

Or something along those lines >.>

The Fiji Times salute alludes to a more sinister figure then intended when they begun celebrations to honour our country’s World War 2 heroes.

Vinaka @Strangepants!

This license plate is full of win.