Archive for April 7th, 2009

Tribe Un-wanted

I was browsing through the papers during the week when I came across this full page advert. 


Nothin much in the way of ‘noteworthy’ you might say. Large picture of movie’s heroes (or in this case, heroine) – check. “Grand Opening Today in Village 6″ title at the top – check. Top movie critics giving the movie their undivided love – chec – wait. What’s this?

Ok lets back up abit here. LA Times as a revered movie critic. That I can understand. Yahoo.com? They’ve certainly got the web space, as well as the reviews to show for it. But what is this ‘tribe.com.fj’? Judging by its .fj address, I warranted a local website, possibly trying to cash in on the movie’s hype by dropping in its own seat blowing thumbs up one liner.

The commendation for the movie from the website made me grimace. “A 3D Animation”? To call a 3d film a ’3d animation’ is to miss out on the opportunity to use the word “MOVIE”. Also, the seat blowing action reference is, well, to put it in a more polite term, lame. I was determined to get behind this movie review, or find out who reviewed the movie with such a great grip on catchy word usage.
Investigatory skills in tow, I headed over to www.tribe.com.fj, expecting, well, not really knowing what to expect. 

“Welcome to the TRIBE”. I certainly felt like I was in tribe land, with totems and flashy graphics aplenty. Ignoring everything else, I headed straight for the movie section, where clicking on the “Monsters vs Aliens” link gave me this:

Visions of long, flowery essays glorifying the spaztastic eye candy and chair blowing action that was Monsters vs Aliens quickly faded from my head when all I was greeted with was a copy paste movie synopsis straight from the movie’s IMDB page:
“When a meteorite from outer space hits a young girl and turns her into a giant monster, she is taken to a secret government compound where she meets a ragtag group of monsters also rounded up over the years.”

Needless to say, I was most disappointed. I wanted my action quote! I wanted my ‘blow you out of your freaken goddamn chair’ line! I wanted a local movie reviewer who resorts to downsizing animated movies to a mere ’3D animation’ because quite frankly, thats what all 3d animated movies are! I wanted something that at least required a tad bit more effort then Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V! I want an actual movie review from an actual person, and not some lie drawn up on the Fiji Times page!
Granted, the tribe one liner was a mere ploy to get people to the tribes website. I mean, sure, I can understand, it’s as they say, strictly business. But please, if you’re going to lead the flock astray to your website, make it worth their (and not forgetting my) while and have some content thats at least original.

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