Archive for April 11th, 2008

This weekend is going to be one which is going to be shared pretty much by everyone in the central division of Fiji, Rotuma not withstanding. FEA, in their wisdom and all round caring nature, has decided to celebrate Earth Hour perform important maintenance on their power grid, and will shut down the entire Central division grid of Viti Levu from mid-day Saturday 12th April to 8:00pm Sunday 13th.

Thats a pretty long time in any official FEA power shutdown, since the only other time such a power cut would happen is either during peak hurricane hours or a coup.

So, what can one do during those dark hours to keep one’s self occupied? Worry nai as the locals would have you say, since this blog has undertaken the arduous task of researching worthwhile tasks to keep those idle hands…busy.

1)Cut power cables and sell them on the black market.

As John Michaels would have you believe, it is quite a profitable business cutting up power cables and selling it to the local scrapyard. Sure there’s a prison sentence waiting for you if you’re dumb enough to get caught, but hey, at least you’ll have some money to pay for the ensuring fines yes? And don’t worry. No electricity, no danger. Though plastic flip flops might do the job of protecting your life

2) Go and protest the Chinese govt outside their embassy in Nasese.

The Fiji Times has reported today the arrest of seventeen people who were silently protesting China’s impressive human rights record with the upcoming Beijing 2008 Olympic games. Apparently protesting outside anything Chinese is all the rage so to ensure that we’re not left fashionably behind, grab your own cardboard slogan (don’t forget the bandanna) sign and make your way to the Chinese Embassy. After all, protesting won’t cost you an electric cent, and you’ll be duly noted in the books of all things good and NGO-ish.

3) Store water. Dig a swimming pool in your backyard.

Sure you could invest in a boring old Water Tank. But nothing says I’m a rich boci who can afford to wipe my grog bowl with the new hundred dollar bills like your own backyard swimming pool, complete with new chlorine treatment plant, and added sugar flavours such as Strawberry, Chocolate, and the newest addition, Grog.

5) Go and protest Fiji Rugby’s lame performance in sevens rugby outside the FRU office.

Fiji has been on the ‘suck’ end of the sevens game recently, with a string of losses, no longer the powerhouse that we once were. If you can’t be bothered with all things chinese and human rights, and consider the oval ball life and death, then grab your own cardboard slogan (don’t forget the bandanna) sign and make your way to the Fiji Rugby Union Headquarters. After all, its not such a big deal if we lose the World Cup Sevens next year right? Thought so.

6) Solve the country’s economic downfall.

Fancy yourself a whiz kid at maths, money and all things honey? Then check out the signs. Fiji’s economy isn’t doing so well for itself. We need someone who can help the country back onto it’s money-making feet, bring back those smiley happy tourists, and in general, make Fiji what it used to be back in the good ol’ days of 1970 and such (I heard it was rocking back then). Be sure to post your economic proposals here first. For traffic boost and what not.

7) Watch the Ballu Khan sex video. In like, candle light.

Or not. Your choice.

What do you plan to do during power down weekend?