Archive for January, 2008
What is Wonderful about Great Literature…
If you happen to enter this particular bookstore, you will notice that the following notice is worth noticing.
The Notice
The What is wonderful about great literature is that it transforms the man who reads it towards the condition of the man who wrote. ~E. M. Forster
Although the above notice is not great literature, I would not want to be transformed towards the condition of the man who wrote it.
Sit at home and watch shit fly. Again.
Looks familiar?Yes ladies and gentlemen, it’s that time of the year again where Fiji experiences the joys of mother nature and what she has to offer, namely in the form of a Cyclone called Daman Gene. Thats right, Fiji will be adding yet another historic event to its logbook.
A cursory glance at the above picture will show how Cyclone Daman Gene, was formed right smack bang in the centre of Fiji. Somehow, Daman Gene decided, “You know what? It would be fun to say form right in the middle of Fiji so that EVERYONE can feel the love!” Next thing you know, Fiji gets a hurricane, and a weird sounding one at that.
The only good thing this cyclone ever got right was its timing, choosing to visit just on the start of Monday afternoon, spelling ‘day-off’ for everyone, me included.
On a less then happy note, 4 people were killed in the wake of the cyclone. The most unfortunate death being the form 3 student who went swimming at the vatuwaqa passage on Tuesday, a day after the cyclone was supposed to have passed. However, the winds were still very strong, and the girl was swept away by strong currents.
Lesson of the day?
Cyclone + Sea Current = NO SWIMMING. PERIOD.
Note: If the above post looks somewhat familiar, thats because I’ve copy pasted from a previous article “Sit at home and watch shit fly”. Lazy? Not really. Template? Maybe. I did this to illustrate how often Fiji gets cyclones (we’ve mastered Disaster Management to a fine art I tell you) and perhaps who knows? This could be the new standard for reporting on cyclones and hurricanes happening here in Fiji! 
Its Competition Time Folks!
Posted by Wilson in bloggers, competition on January 13, 2008
Unfortunately, the real reason is alot less exciting (and doesn’t involve sex) though nevertheless necessary, and if done well, should turn out to be slightly more fun then Sunday Dateline Fiji episodes.
A quick cursory glance at the right side of the blog will reveal that we’re nearing our momentous 100th post, this one being the 94th. Also, we’re nearing our 1st year Anniversary. Now while more established blogs tend to go all out and celebrate with no holds barred, we unfortunately do not have a budget to encompass both hired people with loose moral values as well as beer to be poured on said people’s chests.
However, we can commemorate our infamous 100th post as well as our 1 year in running with at least something since cheap skates we are not, and with that I can happily announce our very first contest!
Paradise Not Found: Abort, Retry, Fail? Slogan Competition
Here at Paradise Not Found we’re celebrating our upcoming 1 year in running by offering you faithful readers (yes, all 3 of you!) a chance to win one of these T-shirts!
Click on image for a larger viewAll you have to do is to email us at failedparadise@gmail.com and give us your wittiest slogan that you think best describes this blog. This slogan will go at the top of the website underneath the banner, and will be a shining example of your ability to humour the world, with the T-shirt for bragging rights! A classic win-win situation if I may say.
Before you get your cerebrals cracking, there are a few conditions:
- Only one shirt is up for grabs.
- Email your entries to failedparadise@gmail.com, along with your name and postal address, as well as which T-shirt you’d like to take home should you hit the jackpot. Don’t forget to include your shirt size.
- You can come up with as many slogans as you like – the more the merrier
- This competition will end February 14, 2008 at 9pm PST.
- The real kicker – this contest is only open to residents of the Fiji Islands. No international entries will be accepted. The day we start getting six figure bank accounts to be able to mail stuff overseas is when we’ll make our contests worldwide
- The winning entry will be picked by a panel of judges – namely us – and the decision is final, with the winner notified via email.
Looking forward to seeing some interesting stuff
Viva La Flip-flops!
Posted by Allen in fiji, flip-flops, lifestyle on January 10, 2008
Personally, I prefer the “Bata” brand, which are simply black in colour and plain in appearance i.e. no fancy designs. Since I have yet to become a certified flip-flop reviewer, I won’t go into the pros and cons of the aforementioned brands.
When it comes to footwear, one of the favourite pastimes for most locals when visiting a house, is to walk away with someone else’s pair. This form of activity can also be classified as stealing, but since it has become common occurrence, and due to the fact that the common flip-flops are sold cheaply, most people have come to accept this as the norm. [Translation: This is Fiji Style]
I choose to wear “Bata” flip-flops, when visiting homes where common wisdom has it that there is a very high risk that I may never see my (costly or cheap) footwear again.
Yours truly, recently became a victim of this country’s favourite pastime. What makes this incident rather peculiar is that the culprit walked off with only one half of my flip-flop, and was kind enough to leave behind a smaller size.
The latest in Fiji footwear fashion. I present to you the wrong sizes.Warning: Viewing the enlarged (disgusting) image may cause
Nausea and Loss of Appetite
I guess it’s time to visit the shoe shop for another cheap pair of flip-flops. As for now, I’m content with going pato, which is local speak for barefoot.
Who Wants to be a Movie Star?!
The one movie that caused alot of hollywood hype here in Fiji due to it being filmed up at Navua, Anaconda 2: Hunt for the Blood Orchids was an average B-Grade movie which had huge snakes, dingy boats, people dying for a silly flower, and a few locals, one of them of course being Jonathan.
In his post he explains how he got himself entangled in the movie making process, from failing to recognise the director (I remember asking him “Are you involved in this movie as well?” to which he replied “Yeah, I’m the director) all the way up to the filming of the actual shot (I was a pharmaceutical executive in a New York City boardroom getting ready to send a group of people to Borneo to find the fountain of youth. I was fully in character).
The stars take a dip in one of Fiji’s lovely outdoor health spas.If anything, it gives us an insight to the inner workings of a well oiled movie making machine, even if the movie was all popcorn and no brains, and a little more information on the one flick that put Fiji on the Hollywood map.
Original Post here.
The Obligatory Happy New Year Post
Celebrating the new year in style, pink flip flops and all.(Awesome cartoon courtesy of Awesome Cake)
Unfortunately, I have nothing great, nor funny to share, as a healthy dose of alcohol and a general sense of “I’ve been through this shit before” hangs over me like the reruns of XENA on Fiji TV.
However, I am neither dead nor cripple (my kidney would cry otherwise) and so it is with much relish and delight that Paradise Not Found: Abort, Retry, Fail? welcomes you all to a new year, the year 2008.
New Year Resolutions anyone? I have a few, one of them being of course dedicated to the continued running of this lovely catalog of all things Fijian, Crazy and anything remotely related i.e. this blog. If you don’t have anything in mind at the moment, fear not, you’re not alone. Even the big names in Fiji’s political scenes are coming up empty on a desire for resolutions and changes, such as Felix Anthony, who says, “I don’t have any new years resolution but I’ll continue doing what I have been doing.” (Mind you, the original sentence from the Fiji Times Website had ‘…continue doing but I have been doing’…)
Most publish houses use this opportunity to take a look back at the year 2007, but since this blog’s ‘year’ so to speak is in a few weeks time, I’ll hold that particular post back till the appropriate time.
Otherwise, its just another day in paradise folks. Continue on your merry way please.
And stay away from knives.
What’s your new year’s resolution?
PS: With the new year, a new banner is needed. 2 Fools waiting on the new year, party prepared and primed up. A big thanks to Awesome Cake for the cartoon. Give him some love folks, by dropping by his blog.
And send him some cake.
And don’t forget to CC me as well
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